Je ne me sens pas bien.

Ya know what I mean?
I woke up feeling sick and it's lasted all day. Hate that.

So I thought I would get something that I could do from bed, since I will be here for a while. I looked into that Rosetta Stone thing to learn French... until I saw the price. Some people said it wasn't very good for making conversation.

Then I thought of using a Barbie doll to make a video with me doing the voice. She would be telling my stories and I could put them on You Tube or something less horrible. I'll think of something.

I wish the kids would go back to school. Why do they insist on playing in the road in front of our house? Useless little creatures.

Thanks for nothing NHS.

Sunday, 4 April 2010
Thanks for nothing NHS.
I believe in my last blog on this thing I was talking about being sick and my horrible ear problems. Well, it took 18 months (!) to get an appointment with the ear specialist. That's right, a year and a half! So, I had tests done and all that. Turns out I have a small amount of hearing loss in my right ear and pretty bad tinnitus that is also permanent. This is all because the NHS just couldn't find a place to squeeze me in for an appointment in a year and a half!
I hate this country.

I now have some more health issues, they are dragging their feet with those too. I am in constant pain all day, every day. I can't take Codeine so the best they can do is Paracetamol and anti-inflammatories! DO NOT tell me that there are no other pain killers in the UK that don't contain Codeine. I don't believe much of what they tell me anymore. All I will say is that if I was back home in the US I would have been treated (very well) already.
Don't tell me to go back home. You don't know my story.
Britain can kiss my ass.

Lost my brother.

I lost my closest brother last year on September 24th, two days after his 54th birthday. That's just too young. He had an enlarged heart, it was three times the size it should have been, unfortunately there are usually no symptoms. That's was the case with him. The only good thing is that it took him quick and he probably felt nothing.

We were always very close as kids because we were closest in age and we had three older brothers but they weren't around much.

I'm still very upset about his death. I just can't seem to shake it, even though I've been living in the UK and haven't seen him for 14 years. I got to talk to him once in a while on the phone. He was a workaholic and didn't have much time. Being over here I guess I really got no closure. In a way it's easier. I just keep thinking he's back home in the states, probably at the beach.

Sadly his death caused a huge family fight and left a big split in the family. It's all so stupid. I hate what alcohol does to people. I have only talked to my mother twice in 6 months which is highly unusual. I have since found out what a liar she is and how she frequently talks shit about me behind my back.

That aside, I miss my brother. I always will. He was a pretty good guy.